by Emi Nakamura
It's finally out in stores and available throughout December and January! Real Word Magazine, a local publication that features inspiring stories and "all things creative" from people in Hawaii, asked me to write an article on COURAGE, the theme for this month's issue.
A week after I was asked to write for them, I went through one of the most difficult, confusing, depressing times of my life, and I panicked; I went weeks without sleep, I fell behind in my classes, I couldn't tell anyone what was going on, and my mindset was farthest away from a positive place. How was I supposed to write an article on "courage", a characteristic that is so strong and meaningful; something I thought I didn't embody in the first place, when all over sudden I was faced with a major loss in my life, that I wanted to end my own life? I had planned on writing about my "courageous" decision to become an artist at a young age, regardless of the "starving artist" notion, regardless of what anyone said against becoming an artist––and now, I was unable to think one clear thought, and it felt impossible to write this article.
Somehow, having dealt with heavy anxiety and depression for half my life, I found––ironically––the COURAGE to sit down and write the article. It was the hardest thing to do at that time. Only one thing saved me, and it was the love and passion I have for art. It saved me many times in the past, as I mention briefly in the article, and it happened to save me this time around, too. Writing for Real Word Magazine turned out to be a process of self-discovery, and a much more emotional experience than I expected. After I was finished, I actually became aware of my own courage, not only as a young artist just beginning her journey, but as a whole person. I've always been someone who denied her own accomplishments, and was someone with no self-esteem or self-worth. However, the events in my life always seem to occur methodically, for a specific reason, at a specific correct time, to give me strength and more wisdom. This was a huge one...
I hope to inspire at least one person who reads my article on "courage".
In addition to the issue, my article was included in the Real Word Magazine's 2010 Hardcover Book, a compilation of stories featured in past issues, as picture below:
Thanks to Real Word. Magazine team for all their generosity and hard work!